I love the snow. Mostly for the unexpected school days off but there is something different about having it with children. Something that is annoying… sure, they are adorable the first time they step in it but then… mayhem.
1) it takes 40 minutes to get ready and they complain about how hot they are. You’re hot? I’m the one running around trying to find clothes for you. I’m sweating.
2) why does everyone only have one glove?
2) everytime I shoveled part of the driveway, they through a snowball at me which led to more snow in my cleanly shoveled place.
3) with like fourteen inches of snow, Emily kept getting stuck and couldn’t get out. I was constantly running back and forth between a partially clean driveway and the middle of our yard to rescue her.
4) they want to make a snowman right now. No. I’m shoveling so we can get the cars out. The snow will be here tomorrow.
5) everyone got cold in ten minutes and wanted to go inside because they were wet. Yes- being wet is something that happens when it snows. You clearly made your snow angel too early.
6) Joe and I were finally getting somewhere with the shoveling and then Vincent comes running to the door. ‘Hey mommy. It’s 1230. Can you make us lunch?’ Umm, no. When do you come of age that you can shovel?
7)after lunch they want to go out again. Really? Because all your stuff is still wet and I am not spending another forty minutes of my life for you to play for ten.
8) after we shoveled and came inside, no one made us hot chocolate with alcohol in it. Shouldn’t this be a rule? You don’t shovel, then you become mommy’s bartender.
9) they always want to eat which is a problem. We didn’t go to the store because we thought it was unnecessary. However, we did have enough liquor to get through the snowpocolypse but food is scarce. We cleaned out our pantry on trying to make dinner. Joe is having nachos.
10) I’m on a diet so I am eating brussel sprouts. Screw this. Is the Chinese place open and will they deliver in a state of emergency? I need an eggroll.
Until next time,
Do you want to build a snowman? No.