So our heater broke on the coldest day of the year and my husband is out with his friends. So I tried to fix the heater because why not? I took things apart and plugged things in; I tapped things and I flicked things. The reason I call them things is because I don’t know what the hell I did. What’s nice is that we have an electric fire place; oh wait, that has been broken for six months and I have been asking my loving husband to look at it. So here is a top ten list of things that I have done since I discovered our house is a balmy 59 degrees…
- I handed out sweatshirts to all the children; they are wearing my extra grande sweatshirts so naturally they are lost in the fabric.
- I told them to find slippers; in turn they cleaned up their rooms because they couldn’t find their slippers. Just kidding, they couldn’t find them so I had to locate them. I swear mom’s have a GPS on anything the kids lose but God forbid I lose my keys.
- I gave my kids Christmas cookies and hot chocolate hoping that the sugar will keep them warm. It’s not scientific; I just made it up.
- I actually did housework to stay warm. This broken heater is outrageous. I hope I don’t start dusting because I have only done that once in nine years. It might be gross but at least I don’t have people coming over to the house to hang out.
- Our kids haven’t been staying in their beds so tonight I put as many blankets on them as possible. They are staying in bed literally because of the weight of the blankets.
- I also told them I was tucking them in one time so they better not get out of bed because they would end up freezing.
- All the kids wanted to sleep together to keep warm. Hahaha… no.
- I plan on having a million blankets on my body when my husband gets home… it will totally be sexy.
- Or I can put on my giant adult onsie. I think that screams, ‘come and get me.’
- I am totally spiking my hot chocolate. One- sugar makes you warm because I said so and two- alcohol will keep me warm and fuzzy.
So if your heater goes out and your husband happens to be hanging out with the boys, here is your survival list. You’re welcome.
Until next time,
Maybe I will add whipped cream to that spiked hot chocolate… yeah, the diet is going well.