Vincent Goes to School 

So this morning, Vincent explained to us that he is once again in debt with the school cafeteria. Surprise, surprise.

The kid is in debt every week and this morning, he finally confessed that he gets a milk everyday. Let me clarify, he told us that the milk in the cafeteria refrigerator is ‘free.’ Yes, my friends, my son is apparently stealing chocolate milk and thinking it is free.

After picking Vincent up from school, I found out that he did indeed drink his ‘free’ milk and then he cut art class to be with his girlfriend in gym class.

He is in second grade. Second grade and he is apparently stealing the hard stuff and cutting class.

Until next time,

It’s not stealing if it’s chocolate milk


I’m in Mourning for this Spilled Milk…

The saying, ‘don’t cry over spilled milk,’ was clearly a quote by a complete idiot. Not only was this person an idiot but the person was probably lactose intolerant too. 

Let’s talk about what milk means to me…

1) Ice cream with sprinkles

2) Milkshakes… yes asshole, they are different things.

3) Dipping your cookies in milk 

4) Hot chocolate 

5) Hot chocolate with alcohol 

6) I guess plain milk

7) Breast milk… I spilled mine when I was breastfeeding and cried for days.

8) Cows… follow me here, they are cute, give us milk and taste great between two rolls.

9) Hello… cheese? Cheese… great paired with grapes… which God made solely for making wine and this is the only way I get my daily intake of fruit.

10) Chocolate milk which goes with anything. Breakfast, a snack… you could be in your pajamas or at a black tie affair..  doesn’t matter because chocolate milk will always be there for you.

And that is why I mourn tonight. Found this in BJ’s (haha… BJ’s).

Until next time, 

Clean-up in aisle 5

Umm… Are We Having this Conversation Now?

Vincent and I were driving to school this morning and we turn to park and Vincent starts looking out the window and pondering life. Then he turns to me and says:

‘Mommy, why did I drink milk from your breasts?’ -Vincent

‘Are you asking me this now?’ -me

‘Yeah…’ -Vincent

‘Ok… well… it’s healthier for the baby but bottle feeding is good too and it helps the baby and mommy bond.’ -me

‘Yeah but why did I drink milk from your breast? I mean, it’s not like you’re a cow…’ -Vincent 

‘…….’ -me

Until next time,

Does that breast come in whole milk or skim?